F*#k off fear... I am over you...

F#*k off fear…

I’m over you

Today, it’s my 29th birthday and for the past 3 years I have done nothing but practice trusting the universe. From up-rooting myself out of the house I was renting when I discovered I was pregnant, in order to follow my intuition and go live in nature; deciding to do a natural homebirth when I faced adversity from others, and continuing to live my life by following my passion, even when the road hasn’t been clear and uncertainty is in the air, but I have always continued to be led to the right situations, places, and people…

Time and time again the universe has shown me how loved and provided for I am… but I have often chosen to still not fully believe and kept that security blanket over my head. I’ve been afraid of my full potential and who I came here to really be. I’ve found myself going too deep into thought, pondering all the what If’s, or can I really do this?.. This solar return, I am finally taking that smelly bag of fear to the garbage where it belongs and pushing forward with integrity, trust, and worthiness.

Numerous times I have witnessed the power of healing; in my own life and in others. I have survived a high speed rollover accident, my body lost over 120 lbs, broken bones have healed, scars have faded, my body created my son and I had a dream home water birth… Over and over I have witnessed miracles and so many times I have still decided only to see the illusion of the things that have gone wrong, the things that didn’t work out in the way I thought perhaps should have… I’ve put my self-worth under the condition of if I was receiving other’s approval or not. I’ve held onto the things that scared me, addictions that didn’t serve me, and wanted to put blame on outside circumstances for things I wasn’t happy with in my reality.

But this morning, I woke up and looked in the mirror. I decided that today I am taking total responsibility for my health, my well-being, my dreams, and the progress I am making in my life. No longer can I sit idly by and accept a life of not living it to my fullest potential…. Living in a state of anxiety, fear, doubt and self-criticism gets me no where. I am not afraid of hard work, I am not afraid of effort, I am not afraid of stepping into the unknown, I am not afraid to be on my own, I am not afraid to let go of old habits, I am not afraid to embrace the new, I am no longer afraid to fully trust the universe…

I am not saying the road is easy; that there will not be more sweat and tears on this journey, but I am committing to bettering myself every day and doing what I can to make this world a better place. My soul is guiding me to new adventures, people and situations. I let go of the need to people please and sacrificing my well-being for others… I am not afraid to reach out and say I need help when I need it…. I am not afraid to share my voice and the lessons I’ve learned with others… I am not afraid to smile through the storm…

I am grateful for all the beautiful beings in my life who’ve encouraged me, supported me, loved me, and helped me on my way. We are all in this together and I want to be the best I can in this world. None of us came here to fail, none of us came here to let the darkness take over. We did not come here to let fear keep us glued to the past. Today, I cut the illusionary chains I’ve created and I push forward stronger than ever before. I’ll never give up, I’ll never give in and I’ll never forget the power of unconditional love for self and others. <3